Hello, we continue our wonderful study of the book "Britt Shalom" in the fourth chapter, which is titled "Blessing the Name or Cursing." However, here we also study the different aspects of what we are required to do out of respect for God. We also study how we should show respect to other people around us. We began with respect for father and mother. We did not go into details, but there are important expressions of respect that we need to show towards our parents.
Here, I have provided in section 10 several accepted practices in Jewish law regarding how to honor our parents. It is important to remember that we have two obligations towards our parents — "Fear your father and your mother" — this is called fear (fear), as if I must express some kind of reverence toward my parents. There is also "Honor your father and mother," which means I must also express respect. How do I honor them? How do I honor them? I "offer them food and drink," meaning when I welcome my father or mother, I should offer them a cup of coffee, drinks, or cookies. I must be the one to offer. I am not obligated for it to be from my own money; it could be from their money. But the act of offering has the aspect of respect. I should also accompany them when they enter and leave and in other situations. If my father is leaving the house, I do not just say "goodbye," but I accompany him to the door and even a bit further. The same goes for my mother.
What about fear? What is the expression of the reverence I must feel towards my parents? This means that I should not sit in their place, and I should not reject their words in a way that would cause disrespect. If my parents say something I think is wrong, I should not say "this is wrong," but I should say, "Perhaps it is worth asking why you say that, as there is a possibility to understand it differently," and so on. I can also say "I disagree" but always in a respectful manner, not in an argument.
And I should not address them by their name or anything like that. Sometimes, there is a feeling that I can call my parents by their first names, because I tell myself they are no more than my friends. But that’s not the case. They are the ones who gave me life, so I must speak to them with respect and certainly not use their first name when speaking to them. This also applies to the parents of one's wife. Yes, because a wife is obligated to honor her parents, her husband is also obligated to show that respect, and she should do the same for her husband’s parents.
These are the foundations on which a moral society is built, worthy of having God's name upon it.
